Oh, and if you're worried about hiding your dildo, our sex toy storage guide has got you covered.
Let's dive in!
How to choose the right dildo Big or small?
If you're a total newbie to female masturbation, you might want to try fingering yourself with 1 or 2 fingers or purchasing a small dildo before going any further. A small dildo would generally be around 5 inches or less in length - don't feel the need to use all the length if you're not comfortable.
Realistic or bright purple?
Are you looking for realism or fantasy? Perhaps you're not looking for a penis shape at all!
If you want the real deal, you can get many realistic silicone sex toys designed to feel similar to a real penis inside you. They're usually semi-flexible and feature details like throbbing veins, testicles, and a pronounced penis head.
Alternatively, you can get non-phallic dildos which look more like sexy pieces of plastic. These toys are perfect for lesbians or for women who just aren't that into penises.
What kind of design?
For example, are you going to use the dildo for anal? If so, you need to make sure it has a flared base which protrudes out to stop the toy from slipping inside your anus and getting lost in there (it happens!).
Also, if you want to ride your dildo instead of manually moving it in and out of your vagina, you should probably look for a dildo with a suction cup that can stick to any strong
Looking for additional sensations to enhance your pleasure? Try looking for dildos with unusual bumps and ridges along their shaft which add to your internal stimulation. Personally, I'm a big fan of corn on the cob dildos!
Silicone or glass?
Here at the Sex Toy Collective, we only recommend toys made from non-porous body-safe materials
Sadly, a lot of websites recommend dildos made from dangerous materials like PVC and jelly rubber, which are NOT safe for your vagina.
-Silicone dildos - silicone toys are versatile, come in different levels of firmness, and are really easy to clean and maintain... especially if they're medical-grade silicone
-Stainless steel dildos - these dildos are obviously very stiff and heavy, but are great for massaging your G-spot or experimenting with
-Glass dildos -
-Homemade dildos -
Set the mood
I personally enjoy a glass of wine to loosen up, but don't go getting hammered if you're still new to dildo play.
Listen to your body
I know it sounds like hippie-dippie nonsense, but listen to your body before you start putting things inside it. If you're truly horny and your body is
If your pussy is relaxed and giving you the green light, go for it!
4. Warm up your pussy
Here are some of the most effective ways to get your juices flowing:
-Finger yourself - rather than diving straight in with your toy, lick 1 or 2 fingers and slowly insert them, paving the way for a bigger dildo
-Lube up - use some high-quality lube to get yourself in the mood for play by rubbing your pussy or lubing up a finger and inserting it inside you
One study found that
Our lube guide has more information on lubricants.
5. Deep thrusting dildo play
Be careful to angle the toy correctly, towards the cervix but not toward the bladder. If you feel a slight urge to pee, it might be because you're slamming your bladder rather than your cervix. You could use a firm or semi-firm dildo for deep thrusting motions, depending on your preference.
6. Short and rapid strokes
The only downside about fast strokes is how tiring it can be for your hand. If you're lying down on a bed, try switching between wrist motions and arm motions to move the dildo - it helps you to last longer by using different muscle groups to thrust the toy in and out.
7. G-spot stimulation
If you place 1 or 2 fingers inside your vagina and perform the "come hither" motion towards the entrance of your vagina, you might feel a certain tingle of pleasure from the G-spot. Find it, understand it, and know what this sexual pleasure feels like.
Once you've found the G spot, use a rigid dildo (preferably with bumps and details) and slowly "drag it across" this area to massage the G-spot with a dildo. Firm dildos made from materials like glass and stainless steel are particularly good for G-spot play.
8. Filled up
Even though most of our sensitive nerve endings are found in the first 1/3 of the vagina, there's something psychologically arousing about taking a massive cock in your pussy... what can I say?
9. Double penetration
If you put a dildo in your ass, make sure that it has a flared base and DEFINITELY use lube - the ass does not have any natural lubrication, despite what the
Also, NEVER take a dildo from your ass and put it into your vagina without cleaning it first. Those are two environments that are best kept away from each other.
10. Rock 'n roll!
Thrusting in and out can get boring and repetitive, so why not try rocking your dildo back and forth inside you while keeping it in roughly the same depth of your pussy?
It's only the Rock 'n Roll dildo technique... but I like it!
11. Rotating dildo technique
Thrusting a dildo in and out of your pussy is so old-school... why not shake things up a little? Try inserting a dildo around 2-3 inches inside your pussy in prime G-spot stimulation range.
12. A-spot stimulation
The A-spot, fully known as the
This pleasure zone is located approximately 4-6 inches inside the vagina on the anterior side of the vagina - the side closer to your stomach. It has the potential to create deep vaginal orgasms like you've never felt before.
To reach this spot, you're best using a curved dildo like the Njoy Eleven or Njoy PureWand. Don't hammer it to death (it's very close to your bladder) but massage it slowly with your dildo by "stroking" this deep pleasure spot.
13. Using a dildo anally
Although women don't have a prostate like men, the anal tract is still full of sensitive nerve endings that feel great when you slide a dildo past them.
Anal dildo play requires a ton of lube - try oil-based lube like coconut oil if you want something very longlasting. You probably want a silicone dildo which has a little flexibility to make everything more comfortable.
Personally, I find that the most comfortable anal dildo position is lying down on my side with my knees bent up toward my chest. For me, this position allows me to easily angle my hand to get the toy inside me with a decent amount of force.
If you're struggling, you could try using a suction cup dildo, mounting it on a hard floor, and then squatting over the dildo and "sitting" on it slowly. The gravity helps the toy to go inside your butt, but take it easy nonetheless.
14. Temperature play
Basically, with glass and steel dildos, you can cool them down or warm them up by placing them in a bowl of warm/cold water for a few minutes before play.
Some ladies really enjoy the tingling coolness of a cold steel dildo, while others (like myself) enjoy the feeling of a warm glass sex toy inside them.
It's all about your personal preference, but hot and cold dildos add a whole new dimension of sensation to the dildo experience!
I hope you enjoyed this guide on how to use a dildo!