By: JC Ways
October 8, 2024
Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few decades, chances are that you’ve come across the concept of a strap on dildo at some point in your life. These marvelous inventions allow heterosexual women to even out to playing field when it comes to fornicating with their men, while simultaneously giving lesbian women more creative things to do behind closed doors. If you make sure that you’re using a high-quality dildo for the job, then the orgasms can be mind-boggling.
Although strap on dildos and dildo harnesses seem like the kind of thing that was probably invented in the ‘70s, there is a relic from the Upper Paleolithic Period, around 10,000 BC, which is thought to be a strap-on sex device, and it’s not the only one either!We like to assume that our ancestors were all rather coy and vanilla, yet there are multiple instances of strap-on-like toys popping up throughout history.
In the lost city of Pompeii, a mural was recently discovered in a former Baths which features a man being anally penetrated with a dildo as part of a threesome. Similar murals in the city also depict lesbian strap-on sex and anal pegging too.
Yes, strap on sex has been part of human sexuality for thousands of years, so there’s no use in pretending it’s something to be ashamed about! There are strap-ons for all genders, shapes, and sizes, so don’t be afraid to get experimenting with pegging toys, dildo harnesses, strapless strapons, and more. Here we talk more about the different types of strap on dildos and run down some of the best strapon harnesses and best pegging dildos that money can buy.
Simply put, a strapon is a dildo which is “worn” by one sexual partner and used to penetrate another sexual partner. Lesbian strap ons are often used for woman-to-woman sex where no penises are involved, although some heterosexual men also enjoy “anal pegging” which is where their female partner wears a strap-on and fucks them anally, taking advantage of the prostate (i.e. male G spot) which is located inside a man’s bottom.
Strap on dildos are most commonly used by lesbian same-sex couples and heterosexual couples who want to experiment with anal pegging (the woman pumping the man’s ass with a strap on). Lesbian women with strapons may use regular harness-style strapons to pleasure the receiving partner, although there are also strapless “lesbian strap ons” which are designed to give pleasure to both the giver and the receiver.The wearer usually wears the strap on around their waist, in the same position that the male penis would usually be. Then the partners basically have regular penetrative sex in whatever positions they find most comfortable and pleasurable with the dildo. This could include doggy style, the missionary position, the “cowgirl” position, and much more.
The best strapon harnesses will be sturdy and secure enough to allow for a wide range of sexual positions, opening up new and exciting possibilities in the bedroom for all types of couples.
Harness strap-ons are the most common type, featuring a harness which is worn around the waist and thighs to keep the dildo in place around the wearer’s body. The harnesses themselves are adjustable and often elasticated, usually going from about a 28-inch waist up to a 65-inch waist, so there’s a lot of room for differently-shaped people.These harness-style strap ons usually come with an “O ring” which is a rubber ring which goes over the top of your dildo in order to keep it in place and secure it to the harness. These O rings come in different sizes, allowing for different sized dildos to be used. With a harness, you can usually use any dildo where the base is wider than the shaft, thus giving the O ring something to grip on to. This includes dildos with testicles, suction cups, and flared bases, such as those found on anal dildos.Some of the best strapon harnesses designed for female wearers will include a small pocket where you can place a vibrating bullet against the clitoris, providing the female wearer with additional pleasure. You will also find that some harnesses are padded in this groin area, making it more comfortable for the wearer.Built-in Strap-onsThere are many types of built-in strap-ons available for people who prefer an easy plug-and-play (get it?) way of doing things. For example, there are strap-on harnesses which come with pre-attached non-removable dildos for extra stability, as well as special underwear and corsets which come with built-in dildos too. This makes the dildos more sturdy and secure, but you’re stuck with a one-size-fits-all scenario.Strapless StraponsStrapless strapons, which are sometimes referred to as “lesbian strap ons” (although they’re not limited to lesbian women) are dildos which use an adjustable internal bulb to attach themselves to the wearer. This internal bulb is sometimes called a “pony”. These sex toys can look a little bit like double-ended dildos, but they’re designed with penetration-style intercourse in mind. Women with lesbian strapons need to practice using them regularly, as the technique is difficult to master.
Some strapless strap-ons come with vibrate settings and clitoris stimulators for the wearer, meaning that same-sex female couples could enjoy very intense and intimate pleasure together.
Hollow straponsWe haven’t forgotten about the boys! Hollow strap ons are designed to be worn by men, with the hollow dildo enabling them to slip their cock inside while they give it to their partner. These hollow strap ons are good for mixing things up in the bedroom (trying a longer/thicker cock for instance) and fantasy play. They can also be really useful for men suffering from erectile dysfunction and impotence problems.
“If [those with ED] want penetrative sex, you can always strap on a prosthetic over your penis. Some can be attached by straps and others are hollow dildos that slip over the penis and attach by a strap that extends around the scrotum.”
Samantha Evans, Sexual Health Writer
Whether it’s your first dildo harness experience or you’re an experienced FemDom giving your man intense toe-curling anal pegging orgasms, you need to make sure that you’ve got a decent harness keeping your faux-cock in place! Here we run over the best strapon harnesses for pegging, lesbian sex, and anything else you can dream of.
Sturdy and reliable strapon harness
If you’re looking for a strapon harness which won’t let you down, you’ve found it. The Joque harness is probably the best strapon harness money can buy, coming with multi-layered fabric and mesh for skin comfort, as well as a padded crotch to increase wearer comfort. The product is designed with flexibility in mind, making it easy to try a whole bunch of positions without the harness restricting the wearer.
The Joque comes with a unique stretchy O-ring which basically acts as a universal O-ring for the majority of dildos, so that’s really useful if you’re looking for versatility and experimentation. Furthermore, there are 2 inner pockets in the crotch area which allow you to insert vibrating bullets for increased pleasure for both partners.
This harness is designed to be like a “second skin”, feeling almost natural to the wearer and the receiver. The high-quality construction of this product means that you can use it quite aggressively without worrying about comfort or stability problems – you shouldn’t find dildos flying across the room unexpectedly. The only downside for all this greatness? The price is steep. Sometimes you pay for what you get!
Leather strap-on harness for women
Who doesn’t want a strap on dildo harness named after a famous lion? Sign me up! This harness – which comes in a range of colors – can be adjusted from a 30-inch to 60-inch hip size, meaning that it will fit the vast majority of women. The Aslan harness is designed to be sexy and BDSM-esque, featuring a so-called “double dildo cuff” which allows the wearer to insert a butt plug or dildo into their own body while simultaneously fucking their partner with the strap on!
The back is made in a laced up corset style which is sure to get some people going in the bedroom, while the harness itself is compatible will multiple different sizes of O-ring. If you like the leather BDSM aesthetic and you want to treat your man (or woman) like the little slave bitch that they are, this strap on harness is perfect for you. It’s very well-suited to a dominatrix, if that’s your cup of tea.
All-in-one kit complete with dildo!
If you’re a heterosexual couple looking to try your hand at anal pegging, this is one of the best pegging dildos out there for a low price. This all-in-one kit comes complete with 2 O-rings, a harness which adjusts from 28 inches to 65 inches, and a 7-inch dildo which is curved to help stimulate the male G-spot (prostate). If you’re a man who is not used to ass play, then 7 inches may sound a little bit for your first dildo, but the girth is relatively small, and that can help to make the whole experience more comfortable… believe me!
Everything you need is included in this kit, and that’s where its value lies – if you want to try pegging or lesbian strapon sex for the first time without breaking the bank or learning complicated strap systems, then you need to buy this product. It’s cheap, it’s convenient, and it even includes a pouch for a vibrating bullet (not included) which can stimulate the wearer’s clitoris while she fucks her partner. Also, if you decide you don’t like the included dildo, you can still swap it out for another one due to the removable O-rings.
It’s wise to buy a harness which can accommodate different-sized dildos, especially if you’re new to anal play and you’re not sure if certain dildos will be too big or small for you/your partner to handle.
Cheap and cheerful strap-on harness!
This Amazon description is written mostly in Comic Sans, which is never a great instiller of confidence in me, but nonetheless this product has proven itself to be worthy of this list! Coming complete with a soft, bendy silicone dildo which has an insertable length of almost 6 inches, this $25 strap-on dildo harness is another really good purchase if you want to try out some pegging or lesbian dildo fucking without spending too much cash or reading an instruction manual like the Magna Carta.
The straps on this product are very comfortable, and the overall fit is decent, especially for such a low price. One of the best things about this product is actually its included dildo, which most people find to be not too big and not too small – it’s just the right size for most receivers. Furthermore, the dildo also comes with a suction cup, so you can always remove it from the harness and stick it to the wall/floor/cupboard/wherever and continue the fun in new and innovative ways!
Couture lingerie meets dildo harness
This is probably the best strapon harness in terms of sexiness and comfort, giving the female wearer something to feel comfortable in as they give it to their partner. The lace ribbons can turn “Sasha” from a booty short-style cut into a high-waisted pantie… which is lovely but I’m not sure why they bothered with it.
Nonetheless, the fit is comfortable and the panties can accommodate various sizes of dildo, although they can’t be too big sadly. Essentially, the tradeoff for a comfortable strap on harness is more money and smaller dildos.
The simple way to peg him/her
Although anal pegging and lesbian strap on action is fun and all, who wants to go through all that preparation beforehand? It’s so much work! Instead, why not just slip on a pair of briefs, slip a fake penis through them, and get to it straight away? With these unisex briefs from LoveHoney, you can get to it in the bedroom quickly without killing the mood by faffing around with straps and buckles.
The 1.5-inch O-ring is compatible with most dildos with a flared base, so you’re able to mix and match as you please.
Double penetration strap on for him
This double harness from Spare Parts can effectively act as a double penetration harness, although they are strangely shy about mentioning that in its description. The harness features 2 holes – the top hole is an O-ring designed for the dildo of your choice, which the lower hole is designed to put the male wearer’s erect penis through, acting almost like a cock ring.
This makes it ideal for either people who suffer with ED and need a “backup option” during sex or for people who want to try double penetration with their female partners, assuming that they can get the angle right!
That dildo isn’t going anywhere!
Getting a Vac-U-Lock harness is a bit of a double-edged sword. On the one hand, you get to take advantage of the Vac-U-Lock system made by Doc Johnson so you can be sure that the dildo is locked into place while you’re thrusting away. On the other hand, you need to spend a bit more money for this luxury. Nonetheless, the harness comes with a 45mm O-ring and 2 pockets for holding little vibes near your clitoris, so there’s a lot to rave about here.
The Vac-U-Lock™ system is a patented harness and plug system made by a Californian Adult Toy company called Doc Johnson.Toys from this range offer adjustable harnesses combined with a proprietary plug designed to perfectly hold dildos of various shapes and sizes in place.
What’s the difference between a strap on dildo and regular ol’ dildo? Not much, and most dildos can usually be turned into strap-on dildos if you have the right design and the right harness, but there are a few things that you need to take into consideration.
O-ring compatibleYou need to check the girth of your dildo compared to the size of your O-ring. Some harnesses come with elasticated O-rings or multiple O-ring sizes, so be sure that the circumference of your dildo is smaller than that of your O-ring – you need to get it through the hole!Flared basePretty much any dildo can be turned into a strap on if it has a flared base (i.e. it goes wide at the bottom). Many dildos are flared at the bottom, such as dildos with suction cups, fake testicles, or dildos specifically designed for anal play. If your dildo is long and straight all the way down, there’s nothing for the harness to grab onto.
Soft/ FlexibleAlthough you can use a stiff dildo with a harness, it’s probably best to opt for a dildo which is soft and flexible so that the receiver does not experience too much discomfort. Wives pegging their husbands, for example, should bear in mind that the anus is tighter and dryer than the vagina, so a gentle touch is needed.Now let’s look at the best strap on dildos out there that meet all the requirements necessary. These dildos are compatible with numerous different models of harness – just check the measurements to be sure
Great pegging toys for beginners
Gentlemen, I understand how intimidating your first dildo up the bottom can be, especially if you’re not used to ass play. The thing about ass play is that it gets easier over time, but you need to work up to it. This set is hence great for guys who want to get fucked by their partner but they’re scared about any potential pain.
The smallest of these 3 sizes has an insertable length of 4.5 inches and a 0.8-inch diameter, which is really small and ideal for newcomers. Over time, you can work your way up to the larger size of 6.5 insertable inches and 1.5 inches in diameter, giving yourself some intense pegging orgasms. The toys are even curved so that they hit your G-spot (prostate), so your orgasms are more intense than ever before.
Discreet “Pack and Play” strap-on dildo
The Shiloflexible posable silicone dildo is designed so that it can be worn in a harness under clothes – you can pose the dildo so that it bends down into your pants if needs be. Of course, this is easier said than done, but if you’re kinky enough to be walking about town wearing a strap on, you’ve probably got the technique down I’m guessing.
With more than 6 inches of insertable length and multiple color options, Shilo is a great addition to your strap on dildo collection!
Artsy strap on dildo fun
BS Atelierhave a bunch of dildos with flared bases which are perfect for strap ons, but I must admit that I enjoy the artsy nature of this one. Inspired by the drip paintings of Ukrainian-American Abstract Expressionist Janet Sobel, this dildo comes with 6 inches of insertable length and around 1.5 inches of diameter, making it a decent size for experienced lesbian lovers and peggers.
Bear in mind that you should use water-based lube with this – using silicone-based lube with a silicone-based toy can cause a strange reaction.
Strapless strap ons are often used by lesbians, although strapless pegging is also possible for heterosexual couples too. These toys stay in place due to the internal bulb (sometimes called a “pony”) which goes inside the female partner doing the thrusting. They require some practice and technique to use properly, so do bear that in mind.
The OG strapless strap on
The TantusFeeldoe is the original strapless strap on, using a 3.75-inch-long bulb to stay in place via the wearer’s vagina or anus. The toy is made from 100% medical-grade silicone and comes with a removable vibrating bullet which slides into the bottom of the toy and sends pleasurable sensations through the silicone, helping both partners to get off at the same time.
The only downside is that the bullet is 1 speed only, though you may be able to slip a similarly-sized bullet with more speed settings into the same spot on the Tantus.
Why should one person get all the fun?
This toy is designed to penetrate the wearer with a dildo of their own! The wearer is filled with a curved dildo measuring just over 5 inches, while the receiver gets pumped with a dildo measuring around 6 inches. There is a lot of potential for this toy, especially as a lesbian strap-on, but it does take a lot of skill and practice to get used to.
The design means that you’re a little limited in the positions you can do, and you have to be careful that you and your partner are totally in sync with one another.
“Magic” and affordable strapless fun
This product from Strap U seems to be raved about in the lesbian community, with one reviewer describing it as the “holy grail for lesbian sex”, which is a pretty good review if I do say so myself. The toy comes with 6 inches of insertable length and a “clit pad” for extra comfort and stimulation.
It also comes complete with a removable bullet vibrator, so you can both benefit from even more additional stimulation. Just makes sure that your PC (pelvic floor) muscles are strong, or you might have trouble keeping it in during a more intense lovemaking session.
When it comes to anal pegging specifically, you want to make sure that the dildo is flexible, a reasonable size, tapered, and preferably curved to help hit the man’s prostate, leading to amazing anal pegging orgasms. You only have to browse the pegging subreddit (warning: NSFW!) to see hundreds of guys having amazing pegging orgasms.
Flexible and not too big for the ass!
This flexible dildo comes with an insertable length of 6 inches, making it ideal for men experienced in pegging or other forms of anal play. The soft silicone helps to increase comfort for the man, while the flared base and testicles make it easy for the female wearer to secure this safely into her harness. This product is anal safe and waterproof too, so the possibilities are endless.
All-in-one starter pegging kit
This Tracey Cox pegging kit comes with 2 different dildos, so you can start with the smooth 4.5-inch dildo and work up to the textured 6-inch dildo when you feel comfortable. The kit comes with the 2 dildos, a harness, 3 O-rings of different sizes, and a bullet vibrator for the female wearer. Really, this kit has everything you need if you’re starting your pegging journey.
The 2 dildos are also helpful for “working your way up” to the bigger one, as the ass needs time to adjust.
Small and tapered – ideal for anal newcomers
This little guy is great if you’re new to pegging toys and you’re not experienced with ass play – the small 4.5-inch length is smaller than the vast majority of dildos, and the tapered end and soft material mean that it will slip in more easily than a veiny 10-inch cock would (not that you’re planning on that).
This little kit also comes with a vibrator for the female wearer, so everybody’s having a good time. The only downside to this product is that you might outgrow it pretty quickly and want to step up to something bigger.
There are lots of little accessories you can use to spice up your strap on activities.
You don’t need to limit yourself to basic dildos and vibes – there’s a ton of cool stuff to create new intimate sensations in the boudoir.
Versatile protective saddle for the vulva
This versatile bumper pad, known affectionately as the “Sili Saddle”, is the perfect barrier between your ladyparts and your strap-on harness, cushioning your groin while also providing pleasure to the vulva via the soft silicone membrane. These pads have many potential practical uses, such as increasing comfort when riding a bike, but they also make for a great cushion during your more… vigorous strap-on usage.
syncs up with vr porn
The design of this strap-on chin dildo means that you can perform cunnilingus on a woman while simultaneously penetrating her with a dildo attached to your chin! Though it looks crude, some women have said that it stimulates their G spot while they receive the regular oral sex, leading to some very intense multiple orgasms down there.
BDSM leather thigh harness
If the best strapon harnesses are getting a little boring for you, why not try attaching a dildo to your thigh instead? It sounds strange, but this high-quality leather thigh strapon harness allows you to create new and exciting sexual positions – you just need to have some imagination! These 5-inch wide straps can be extended to a circumference of 25 inches, so they should fit most women and some men.
Affordable thigh strap-on harness
This cheap thigh strap comes complete with an O-ring that is 1.5 inches across, so there are plenty of dildos that you could combine with this strap if you wanted to. The strap attaches via strong Velcro, so it’s easy to put on and take off, and it’s also machine washable, which is really convenient if you enjoy your session a little… too much.
Shut that sub up at once!
This unique gag strap takes the form of a 3-inch dildo, filling your sub’s mouth up with a cock so that they really can’t make any noise. This adjustable, washable cock gag is a convenient and quick way to let your bitch know who’s boss.
I mean, what actually makes something a “lesbian strap on” as opposed to some other kind of strap on? It’s hard to say. It reminds me of our guide on gay male sex toys where we had to contemplate what made a sex toy “gay” apart from the fact that it might go inside a man’s bottom. But then here we’ve talked about pegging, which involves putting things up straight men’s bottoms! Aren’t these blurred boundaries wonderful?
Anyway, what makes a strap-on good for lesbians?
Dildo styleIn case you hadn’t guessed, lesbians are not attracted to penises sexually, so they may decide to go for a dildo style which isn’t too realistic. After all, two women making love needn’t be interrupted by a big fake penis! For this reason, many same-sex female couples opt for dildos which look more like fancy plastic than real penises, with stores like BS Atelier selling plenty of non-penile dildos.
Vibes
Although men get little stimulation from strap-on-derived vibrations, women have plenty of sensitive nerve endings around their clitoris, vulva, and vagina which vibrators powerfully stimulate. In fact, it’s said that women orgasm more easily with vibrators, so it’s definitely worth taking into consideration when 2 women are present!
Strapless variety
Many lesbians enjoy using a strapless strapon which is held in place via a bulb inside the wearer’s vagina. Some varieties of strapless strap-on come with in-built vibrations and “rabbit” clitoris stimulators for the wearer, so both female partners get to experience intense pleasure while still having sex in a penetrating manner.Our favorite lesbian strap-onsIf you’re looking for some good go-to lesbian strap-ons, these would be our recommendations below. I’ve tried to include a few different types and lengths to suit everyone’s needs!
Assuming you’re using the harness-style strap on, which is what most strap ons are, then you simply have to attach the harness to your body in the same position that you would wear a pair of briefs or panties, positioning the dildo where a man’s penis would be on his body. If your harness can accommodate different-sized dildos, fasten a dildo to the crotch of the harness by slipping it through the opening and securing it in place with an appropriately-sized O-ring – these rings come in different sizes for different thicknesses of dildo.
You could use a strap on for vaginal sex, anal sex, oral sex, or anything else you can think of. There are no rules for using strap-ons in the bedroom – just make sure that the toy you’re using is fit for the purpose you give it (material, shape, size etc).
Using a strap-on in the bedroom is kind of like using a real penis or fingers – it’s yours to do with what you please. However, you should always use liberal amounts of lube with a strap on, as a plastic toy has no natural means of lubrication and it may not always slip inside someone as easily as a penis or finger.
Strapless strap-ons are usually only able to be worn by women, as they use the vagina to stay in place. You use a strapless strap on by inserting the “bulb” end (sometimes called a “pony” for reasons I don’t understand) into the vagina, angling the phallic end so that it sticks out of your vagina at a similar angle to a penis. Depending on the brand of dildo you’re using, the “bulb” end could affix itself to your vagina in different ways, so be sure to read the instructions before use.Using a strapless strapon requires patience and practice, so don’t expect it to be a walk in the park straight away. Keeping the toy inside your vagina sturdily (as the wearer) requires you to have very strong pelvic floor muscles, so it’s advisable to regularly perform some Kegel exercises in order to strengthen these muscles. Be gentle when using this type of sex toy in the bedroom – if you get too vigorous, it could be uncomfortable for both of you.
If you’re using a strapon for anal pegging, you should aim for a smaller-to-medium sized dildo which tapers at the end, as this is best for penetrating a man anally without causing too much discomfort. Nonetheless, if your man is used to anal play and he wants you to fuck him with a bigger strap on dildo, there’s nothing to stop you as long as you play safe! Also bear in mind that men can achieve intense pegging orgasms if you hit their prostate, which is their male G spot. Curved dildos are best for prostate stimulation during pegging, as the prostate is positioned towards the man’s abdomen once you are inside him. Here is a link to a picture of the prostate within the body so you can get a better idea.
You could peg a man in numerous different positions, but if you’re trying to stimulate his G spot and make him moan in pleasure, then I’d recommend fucking him in the “cowgirl” (him on top) or “missionary” (him on the bottom) positions. I’ve found these to be very effective personally.
Although it will never match up to the sturdiness and comfort of an authentic strap on harness, it is possible to make your own strap on at home as demonstrated in this helpful YouTube video by a lady called Louise. It’s really simple – all you need is a dildo with a flared base and 2 long, thin scarves.
1. Tie a loop into the first scarf which is a little bigger than the girth of your dildo2. Slide your dildo through the loop and then tie the loop gently at the base of the dildo (acting as the O-ring)3. Take the 2nd scarf and thread it through the bottom of the loop from the first one4. Tighten up your loop with the first scarf and pass the ends of the scarf around your waist, tying them together so they stay in place
5. Take the loose ends of the 2nd scarf and pass them under your thighs and behind you, tying them to the waistband you have created6. Voila! Enjoy your DIY strap-on!
Looking back at history, it seems that strap-ons have been a part of our sexual culture since the dawn of time, whether they’ve been used by men or women alike. Our sexuality is a journey, and we should remain open to numerous forms of sexual pleasure with our partners, including those which involve strap on dildos and other forms of toy-derived pleasure.
I’ll be honest with you; before I wrote this article, I didn’t realize how diverse and multifaceted the world of strap-ons really is!
I hope this article informed you about the best strapon harnesses and the best strapons for pegging, lesbian sex, and other forms of exciting sexual pleasure. Whatever you do with your strap-on, just make sure that you stay safe, protect yourself if necessary, and keep an open mind.
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So sexy