As a gay man, I’d always find it frustrating whenever I’d search Google for “how to bottom" or "how to prepare for anal sex".
On the one hand, there’d be the extreme gay douche guides telling you how to prepare for a fisting from 20 people, on the other hand, there’d be writers for women’s magazines who blatantly knew fuck-all about anal sex and talked about it like it was the most painful and terrifying thing on the face on the earth.
It’s just a cock up the ass Karen, you aren’t going to ‘Nam.
There’s a lot of fear and misunderstanding about anal sex prep, but here I’m going to give you a simple and straightforward guide on how to prepare for anal sex if you just want to take a good ass-fucking without getting a colonic beforehand.
What is douching?
Need a general douche definition? Well, anal douching is the act of cleaning out your anal cavity to prepare for anal sex. The goal of douching is to minimize the chance of poop and/or bad smells from ruining your anal sex session. Most douches use simple water to clean out your rectum, with the doucher “squeezing” or “pooping out” the water multiple times throughout the process. This is designed to flush out small or large pieces of poop which would otherwise disrupt anal sex.
Douching too often can lead to multiple problems inside your colon, such as irritation, constipation, and "douche dependency" – don’t douche more than you need to.
The 4 main types of anal douche
There are 4 main types of anal douche that you’ll come across, and these are:
- Shower Enemas – douche nozzles that attach to your shower hose
- Enema Bulbs – bulb-shaped enemas that are commonly used before anal sex
- Fleet Enemas – medical enemas filled with special saline solution
- Enema Bags – old-fashioned enema bags which are a little outdated and slow
However, I wouldn’t generally recommend the Fleet enemas because the saline solution inside them can have nasty side effects and irritate your colon.
Some people empty the liquid out of them and just fill them with regular water, but that seems like a waste of money unless you really like the shape of the Fleet enema bottles.
I also wouldn’t recommend old-school enema bags simply because they’re slow and laborious to use. They also look quite medical and outdated, which doesn’t help to get one in the mood for an anal fucking.
In my experience, shower enemas and enema bulbs are the best tools to prepare your anus for penetration.
If you’re a curious lady or it’s your first-time gay sex as a bottom, these are the enemas I’d recommend. In the next sections, we’ll look at shower enemas and enema bulbs in more detail.
Method #1 How to Use a Shower Enema
Shower enema kits are a fast and efficient way to clean out your ass when preparing for anal sex. Assuming that you’re stood in the shower with the shower douche nozzle firmly attached to your shower hose, here is what to do:
1. Turn on the water!
Make sure that the water is lukewarm – not too hot and not cold. You should be able to rinse the inside of your wrist without the temperature feeling uncomfortable – a bit like when you test a baby's bottle temperature. Don’t have the water pressure ridiculously high, either. If you point the douche nozzle straight up, the water should shoot up about 5 inches before it starts to fall back down again.
2. Lean the nozzle against your hole
It’s hard to relax your anus when there’s a stream of water pounding against it, but it’s the sort of thing you get used to. If you’re experienced with anal sex, you’ll be used to forcing your anus into relaxation!
3. Fill your ass with water for 5 seconds
Unless you’re planning to remake Dawson's 50-Load Weekend, 5 seconds should be enough to get the water inside your lower colon. You don’t want to fill your ass for too long – the higher into your colon that the water goes, the longer and more difficult it is to get it out again. Most anal sex only requires you to clean the first 6 or 7 inches of your ass – we’re not going deep-sea diving here.
4. Hold it in for a few minutes
If you can, squeeze your asshole and keep the water inside you for 30 seconds or 2-3 minutes if possible. I personally like to get out the shower and jump up and down on a dry surface, encouraging the water to clean all the nooks and crannies inside me. If you’re trying to be discreet or you’re staying inside the slippery shower, then jumping around isn’t advisable.
5. Squirt it out!
Squirt the dirty water out of your ass! You can get out of the shower and do this in the toilet if you like, or you could do it directly into your shower drain if you’re prepared to deal with any poop which might come out. If you’re gonna squirt into your shower drain, make sure that the drain cover is off and be prepared to use the stream of water to break up larger pieces of… crap.
Sometimes you’ll just be dealing with brown-ish water while other times you’ll be doing with solid poop. It depends on your digestion, what you’ve eaten recently, if you pooped that day already, and more.
6. Rinse and repeat
Repeat the above process until the water comes out clear and without any nasty smells. This could take 5 or more repeats depending on the day, so be prepared for a lengthy douching session.
7. Clean your hole
When you’re done, be sure to clean your exterior hole with soap and water or a baby wipe. There’s no point in cleaning your ass for anal sex if your exterior hole tastes like shit when they rim you.
Method #2 How to Use an Enema Bulb
Using an enema bulb is similar to using a shower enema, but it takes a little bit longer on average. However, enema bulbs are generally quite safe and easy to use. They’re also very easy to pack and take on trips so you can clean your anal cavity on the go if your hotel shower isn't compatible with a shower douche nozzle.
1. Fill up your bulb
Take off the spout section and fill your bulb up to the top with lukewarm water. As with all douching, the water should not be too hot or too cold. Once it’s filled to the top, re-attach the spout and keep it upright to stop water from leaking out.
2. Lube up
Lube up the tip of the spout and/or your anus before insertion. You might want to finger your ass for a couple of minutes with lube to help it get warmed up.
3. Remove any air
Grab the bulb enema in your hand and gently squeeze the bulb until a small amount of water comes out the end. This helps to remove any air in the nozzle before insertion.
This is the same principle as doctors always squeezing a bit of liquid out of a syringe before an injection – injecting air into your bloodstream can be fatal. You won’t die if you push air into your ass, but you will probably fart a bit.
4. Insert the spout
Gently insert the lubed up spout about 1-2 inches inside your anus – not too far. Stop if it feels uncomfortable.
5. Squeeze the bulb
Squeeze the bulb firmly, forcing the water inside your bottom. You might need to squeeze the bulb quite hard to do this, and it’s normal for cheaper bulbs to leak a little bit during this process. Once you’ve squeezed all you can, remove the spout.
6. Hold it in
Just like with the shower enema, try to squeeze your anus and hold the water in for 30 seconds to 2-3 minutes if possible. Again, jumping up and down (if it’s safe to do so) may help to get the water cleaning your insides more effectively.
7. Squirt it out
Squirt out the water into your uncovered shower drain or toilet, depending on your preference. Bear in mind that you may need to deal with large pieces of poop, so the toilet is usually the safest option.
8. Rinse and repeat
Repeat this process until the water comes out clear and clean, smelling like water rather than… crap. You might need to repeat this process 5+ times, though I find that 2-3 times usually is enough.
9. Clean your asshole!
Use a baby wipe or soap and water to clean your exterior asshole once you’re done. Just don’t use toilet paper, as it tends to leave small paper fibers on your hole which aren’t exactly erotic.
Anal Douching Tips
Now you know how to use a douche, here are some general anal douching tips to assist with your anal sex escapades!
Eat a Fiber-Rich Diet
Eating a fiber-rich diet normalizes your bowel movements and helps to keep your colon healthy. This makes your poops more “clean” and “uniform” on the way out. You should also try to avoid hot/spicy foods before bottoming, and if you’re sensitive to dairy products, avoid those too.
Homemade Anal Douche
If you’re about to have anal sex and you don’t have a shower enema or enema bulb to hand, then a water bottle with sports-style cap is a great homemade anal douche when you don’t have a better option.
Weigh Yourself Before You Start
Wanna make sure that all that water has left your body? Try weighing yourself before douching, taking note of the weight, and then weighing yourself again after you’re done. If the weight has increased, there may be some water left inside your colon. Bear in mind that you need very accurate scales for this.
Consider Not Douching at All!
It’s becoming more and more popular to avoid anal douching altogether if you “feel” like you’re empty. If you’ve just recently had a bowel movement and your ass “feels empty”, there’s a strong chance than you’re good to go. You get used to sensing this “empty” feeling after a while. In fact, some doctors recommend avoiding douching before anal sex, or only douching a very small amount.
"Imagine if you line up ten guys, and you're going to top them all. Even if they haven't prepared, nine out of ten would be completely stool-free."
Dr. Evan Goldstein
Best Anal Douches and Enemas to Try
Looking to get an anal douche or enema on that sweet Amazon Prime membership? Here are some great products to try that Amazon will deliver straight to your door in discreet packaging.
Best Shower Enema
The CleanStream shower enema kit comes with a 6-foot hose which makes using it very easy in awkward positions. The CleanStream kit comes with a 3.5-inch nozzle and a larger 5-inch nozzle, although the company also makes a kit with 4 different nozzle sizes (one of which is flexible) which you can find here on Amazon.
Best Enema Bulb
This enema bulb from OTBBA comes with a 2.85-inch spout and locking system which stops water from escaping, making it one of Amazon’s cheapest and bestselling bulb douches. However, this transparent enema bulb from Aussie Health Co. comes with a set of 3 different tips to choose from. You can choose from hard PVC, soft PVC, or ultra-hygienic stainless steel. Take your pick!
I had to laugh when you said you jump up and down when you have the water inside your ass! That is so funny, but I do not think that really works.
Great tips!!!! The jumping worked for me! I can’t wait until my lover comes home. We are a lesbian couple branching out to new and exciting things. So far I can’t complain
Glad to hear that! Yeah, the jumping feels a little silly, but it does help a lot!
Hello, my name is Cameron
I am a first time participant in this, and I’m very excited to give it a go 🙂
Thank you for being blunt. for saying what we are all thinking but don’t say out loud lol best article i have read about anal douching and i have spent so much time googling this and nothing i found answered questions i had but you put all my fears to rest and thank you again for your article truly ..
It is fun to play with different nozzle shapes and sizes on a showery shot kit. Really relaxes and warms up the 6 to 8 inches near the P or G spit nerves and the spine connection to pleasure centers in your brain!
Wish my wife was as good as you
Thank god for this article. I’d just read the Cosmo guide and was on the verge of cancelling! Great info cheers
thanks for this article, this is the info I was looking for and not finding anywhere else.
I tried anal douche 5 and 6 times but my colon is not cleared.
Hi Rogan. Have you tried adjusting your diet? Try eating more fiber (and/or taking fiber supplements) to make your poops more solid.
Thanks for some good info, as a learner and wanting to try some cock I was worried about mishaps, feel reassured now, thanks.
Glad to be a help Dave!
I have just started experimenting with bum play on myself…toys only past few months… I use a pot of warm water..and a turkey Basseterre… Seems to work great…no worries it never went back to kitchen…lol. easy to take apart rinse out with soap and water. I dry out with hair dryer…don’t want mould…. No problems so far…
Hi Maxx, I’d recommend buying an enema bulb. They’re very cheap and do the same thing as a baster, but you don’t risk all of that cross-contamination.
question . how much water should i force inside ? ive found that putting too much water stirs your innner bowels and doesnt work .
If you’re using a bulb-style enema, I’d say 1 bulb-full, empty it out, and then see if you need to repeat.
You dumb, bulb-style enemas are dangerous for your bowels. Do you are aware about the amount of air inflated inside? First study, then talk.
Hi Jenny, You push the excess air out before insertion so that just the water is going into your bowels. Hope this helps.
So hard to find good straightforward advice. Thank you
the best douche I know is on amazon, called ‘Clean Pass Douche’
perfect! once you use it there is no turning back
I’ll have to give it a try!
I haven’t been topped in 12 years it was fairly regular before that and I never had to anal douche it was always clear. Now I’m older and considering being more active in the anal zone and not as confident about being clear. I’m definitely gonna try some of these. You didn’t mention the female douches on the market with scented water or using oils of any kinds. What about those?
I generally wouldn’t recommend scents and oils because they are more likely to irritate your bowel.
DO NOT USE THEM. Women’s scented douches are filled with bad chemicals and shouldn’t be used in general. Water works perfectly fine for anal and vaginal douching. If you wouldn’t eat or drink it, I don’t recommend putting it in your body
My final phase after seeing clear water is to apply a mild shampoo to a couple of fingers and insert to scour the walls of my anus, then a rinse and clean the outside.
Hi Dave, I wouldn’t recommend putting shampoo inside your anus. Maybe keep a bottle of lube nearby to do the same thing with?
Your tips on Anal Douching were very informative and took away the stigma of anal sex
Thank you very much Glenn 🙂
“It’s just a cock up the ass Karen, you aren’t going to ‘Nam.”
I couldn’t stop laughing, it’s very true though. Anal isn’t bad at all.
I think it’s pretty bloody nice personally!
I found that hilarious too and had to show my friends (in the room).
Lmaooooo!!!! That was hilarious!!!
Thank you very helpful, found sites that talk about it but don’t really explain it. You’re great!
Thank you, glad to be a help! 🙂
Thank you so much this will be my first time with my husband and I just wanted to enjoy it without the mess
Excellent. Describ all the necessary things didn’t leave room for anything.
Glad you liked the guide 🙂
J.C. Way, you are a hero.
I try! 🙂
Thanks for the greatest guide I have seen so far, but i still have se issues… I am usually clean after 3rd of 4th round, but then after some time, usually 40 to 60 min, I suddenly feel urge to poop ad I have to go again. Any idea how to avoid this? Because of that, I havent yet have the courage to try bottom play with my partner. Am I putting in too much water? And another question, if I empty myself and then successfuly douche, how long can I expect to remain clean?
It’s possible that you’re using too much water or you’re not relaxed enough to let it all out initially. Sometimes anal play can also stimulate a feeling of “I need to poop” even though you don’t need to. I’d say try less water, practice some relaxation, and see how you feel. It might be nerves/anxiety that’s causing your issue.
It’s hard to say how long you’ll be clean for after douching, but I’d say at least a couple hours on average.
I have the same problem.
Even when I’m initially clean, after a few in-out motions my toys usually draw out more poop residue. On some rare occasions it’s fine after taking out the dildo, washing it and repeating the procedure a few times. Othertimes, it just goes on and on and on…
For that reason, I use an old fashioned enema bag or if I have a shower nozzle installed, I use at least a minute of water flow. And repeat a few times. Unfortunately this prep can take up to two hours but after that I know I’m good to go for 6 to 12 hours depending on when I last ate…
Hey Jeannette. Have you considered dietary issues? If you’re eating a healthy high-fibre diet, then poops should be relatively uniform and solid, reducing this problem. It might not be the issue, but just a suggestion!
Love you for being so honest. I’ve always fantasized about anal but never been brave enough. Met a new guy and he’s going to educate me, so reading this blog is really reassuring.
No worries! Hope you have a good time 🙂
Thanks for being here and so frankly helpful.
But you have been taught to be against the body. So sometimes you are over-mystified by the tree, by the green tree; sometimes mystified by the moon and the sun, sometimes mystified by a flower – but you are never mystified by your own body.
Osho. Tantra (p. 5). Watkins Media. Kindle Edition.
Nobody talks about this; please don’t be in too much of a rush when you’re cleaning out and don’t push too hard. I was having mostly last minute anal sex so I would try to clean out super fast. Unfortunately I gave myself a hemorrhoid in the process. Not a painful one, but a big bump and I’m soooo f***ing bummed about it. It’s not attractive to say the least, even thinking about it grosses people out and I haven’t had anal sex since then (2.5 years). Being a bottom was everything to me, I miss it more than you can imagine and I fucked it up doing something nobody talks about. Getting clean is great, I really appreciated the confidence, just don’t force it. No matter how bad you want to get laid, just chill.
This is really good advice. You really need to relax and be careful when you’re messing with your natural bodily functions. I hope you can get back to bottoming again soon!
Interesting. I use the Sportfucker anal douche or (for deeper cleansing) the longer one by Mr B leather. I squirt it out in a bucket and use the stuff for my plants. It’s naughty and sexy. Than I am clean for at least 24 hours and can bottom without worrying. Fisting takes more care.
I learnt so much here, thanks.
It looks like I was initially over douching, but now I’m making sure I only have a weak stream and keep the shower douching nozzle in for 5 seconds. I realised that although I finally do it correctly I am still not fully clean one hour in the process.
I know that my stools are quite loose anyway, so in the meantime I’m looking to firm them up.
How long would you recommend one session of douching to last in this case?
It’s really hard to say. I ‘d say that you should work on having firmer bowel movements first because that’s gonna be your biggest problem at the moment.
This blog is the most informative guide to anal douching I have read to date. Thank you so much for taking the time to write it. Now I feel confident in performing this, I’m looking forward to the upcoming anal play!
Glad to be of help 🙂 Have fun!
Your sexy. Teach me bby Lol
Thank you for the anal cleansing, I have to cleaning my anal with shower exactly the way explained. My partner has an 8 1/2 dick, so I put the hose up 6 inches to make sure its clean, guess that is not a good idea, it takes me hours to make sure there is nothing at all and make sure its clean. Do I just do the tip or should I put the hose slightly up because he is big.
Depends.. are you using a special shower attachment for douching?
in my experience; it is going to take a while to get nice and clean. Especially with deeper and or longer sessions.
I wish it was different but it takes me hours too in order to prep
This is what I needed to read, straight to the point and hopefully effective. My first experience wasn’t the best, as I didn’t hold the solution in and ‘jump up and down’. Thankfully I had a very understanding ‘top’.
Glad you liked it! When it comes to butt sex, you have to always be prepared for a little accident and a good top won’t freak out when shit hits the fan (literally!)
Should my man use a condom for his safety?
I’d recommend using a condom for anal sex, yes 🙂
its really amazing blog I like it because I got what I need from it I recommended it to all of the